Excerpts taken from William Ury’s book “The Power of a Positive No!”


  • We are “accommodating” saying YES, when we want to say
  • When you say NO, You are exercising your power versus tending to the relationship.
  • A YES is destructive if it undermines our deepest interests.
  • Half our problems come from saying YES when we should be saying NO.
  • “Speak when angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret”, William Ury.
  • Martin Luther King: “Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about the things that matter.
  • When we “ACCOMMODATE” we build up resentment, suppress our feelings, eventually explode, then feel guilty and accommodate or avoid – again!
  • Saying NO means saying YES to yourself and protecting what is important to you.
  • A positive NO balances power and relationship in the service of your interests.
  • A positive YES = you stand on your own feet but not on their toes.
  • NO creates, preserves and transforms.
  • “Every important YES requires a 1000 NO’s” – Warren Buffet
  • NO gives you the freedom to be who you truly are and to do what you are truly here to do.